Spaces Between Large Rocks

"Do you think I'm wonderful? she asked him one day as they leaned against the trunk of a petrified maple. No, he said. Why? Because so many girls are wonderful. I imagine hundreds of men have called their loves wonderful today, and it's only noon. You couldn't be something that hundreds of others are."
— Jonathan Safran Foer

 “Objects in mirror may be closer than they appear”. I believe this is a very dangerous statement.

There are so many stories about home.

When I was little every Memorial Day weekend my Dad would take my brothers, sisters, and I fishing. This was the one weekend that my Mom caught a break, and just got to well…be. I don’t know how she did it, but Ill save that for another time. Anyways, so we would head up to Cantwell Creek to go fishing. My Dad wasn’t the best, well, supervisor. He would head down to the docks and us kids were left to run amok around the camper. Well, Randal, who was born 45 years old, would always go with my Dad and be responsible, but the rest of us…not so much. Nick use to create nooses and hang our stuffed animals by the neck in the camper. Obviously, I would get very upset because stuffed animals have feelings. Duh. I had a stuffed Koala named “Kawawi”, naturally. And my sister had a stuffed monkey named “George”. They went everywhere with us, and my brother loved to torture them.

I got off track there for a second. So anyway, on one fishing trip my brother and sister decided it would be a great idea to send a message in a bottle. But of course, this message HAD to look very old. So they decided to burn the edges of the paper in the camper. Nick accidently dropped the letter on the ground. I took off running down to the docks, to make sure Dad knew I had nothing to do with it. Classic Kristen. My Dad never found out of course…and while I was gone my sister and brother were able to put out the fire.  

Out of somewhere I have something I have never had, and sad is happy; that's all I see.


"But I still couldn't figure out what it all meant. The more I found out, the less I understood."
— Jonathan Safran Foer (Extremely Loud and Incredibly Close)

I also remember finding secret enjoyment in peeing in the spaces between the large rocks that lined the river.

I had a fascination with Pee I think. I also remember having pee races with my twin friends Molly and Emily in the middle of the night. We would sneak out to their drive way, which was paved and relatively steep. We would pee on the pavement and see whose stream would run the farthest. I think Molly always won.

In fact, I believe the first time I played truth or dare I was dared by Robin to pee standing up. She claimed that depending on your mood your pee went in different directions. I took the dare, but never found validity in that statement.

Cupcakes. Candy. Candles. Cats. All good things.


"Draw a crazy picture,
Write a nutty poem,
Sing a mumble-gumble song,
Whistle through your comb.
Do a loony-goony dance
'Cross the kitchen floor,
Put something silly in the world
That ain't been there before."
— Shel Silverstein

Shel Silverstein has all the answers.

We're writing it ourselves one day at a time.

I look at pictures of people in my life, and you can tell by that sparkle in their eye when they are posing for a picture and when they are just truly happy. Its great to see when people are truly lighting up, because you feel like you are witnessing a moment of joy captured in time, as opposed to them stopping an activity in order to pose and smile pretty for the camera.

So...I am trying to restructure my own life. Process my feelings. Trust myself.


"Of course it is happening inside your head, Harry, but why on earth should that mean that it is not real?"
— J.K. Rowling